Wedding Planner or Nah?

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So, he popped the question and you said YES! You’ve dreamt about your dream man proposing and now it’s become a reality. You’re ecstatic, full of love and cannot wait to plan your big day. Only to realize once you start thinking about every little detail of your wedding you feel overwhelmed and a sense of stress. Where do you start? Where will you have the wedding? What colors will you go with? The questions are endless! This is where a wedding planner comes in. Wedding planners are not for everyone, but they do, however, make the planning process a heck of a lot easier for the bride and groom. Not to mention you get to enjoy the process a little more, rather than stressing about every little detail. After all, this is one of the most special days of your life; you want to make sure you enjoy every last detail of it!


Quick Reasons Why A Planner Is RecommendeD...

1. Allows you to enjoy the process and reduces stress

2. Helps you avoid costly mistakes

3. Provides professional advice

4. Budget Management

5. Conducts Contract Reviews & Negotiations

6. Gives you a safe place to vent because quite honestly your friends are tired of hearing about it!

7. Creates a seamless wedding day


What exactly will a wedding planner help me with?

A planner will save you loads of stress and feelings of being overwhelmed, but you ask yourself, “What exactly will my consultant help me with?” This can differ depending on what package you decide to go with. Each planner offers different packages, meaning what services they will be helping you with or even handling on their own during the wedding planning process.

Do you want a planner to help from start to finish? Are you having your planner assist halfway through the process or do you just need day of coordination? Figuring you’re wanting help from beginning to end (full service), this can be more detailed as far as what your planner will do. Your consultant will do all the planning and dirty work; calling vendor after vendor, scheduling cake tastings, setting up appointments and so on. She will be at each and every appointment with you to help share her ideas and expertise. Planners want your day to be over the top special, so typically they will go above and beyond to make sure this happens. Your wedding planner will make sure your big day is the wedding of your dreams!


Planner or No Planner this is your day! We suggest enjoying every moment of it!

Grooms Inspiration

 For the Dapper Groom and his Groomsmen

 

Ladies, we do so much to make sure our look is absolutely perfect on our wedding day. Even though it’s extremely important for you to look and feel like the beautiful woman that you are, you don’t want to forget about the most important man in your life…your future hubby! Most guys will take all the advice they can get, when it comes to choosing their wedding attire. Although we know, there are some men that feel pretty fearless in this area; a few helpful tips can always go a long way. 

The wedding process can be stressful for both the bride and groom, but we all know, when it comes to shopping and trying to find an outfit…this is typically not something men enjoy! There’s even more pressure on them since it’s such an important day. To make it as easy as possible for guys to feel good about the wedding process, any suggestions or input would help your groom immensely.

Since we are enjoying the spring season right now, we’ll focus on some great spring looks for your man……

Classic Tuxedo

This look is self-explanatory. If you’re wedding is indoors, traditional and fancy; you can not go wrong with this classic look.

Seersucker Suit

In my opinion, a seersucker suit is the true definition of spring suits for men. This look is great for a spring wedding or a Southern wedding.

Laid Back Blazer

This is for the casual bride and groom. A laid back blazer with some slacks is a great look for a backyard or garden wedding.

Pale Colored Suit

This look is seasonally appropriate and looks effortless. Pale colors are great for an outdoor wedding.

Fellas, don’t forget about your shoes!

Bridal Beat Down

BRIDAL MAKEUP

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Alright ladies, let’s talk makeup! On your big day, what look are you going for? What is your day to day makeup regimen? When it comes to makeup, are you more conservative or edgy? These are just a few of the questions you should ask yourself before you decide what makeup look you want on your wedding day.

Your personality, facial characteristics and wedding dress design should all be factors you take into consideration when you create your amazing final look for your wedding day.

TO  DO  YOUR  MAKEUP  YOURSELF  OR  GET  IT  DONE  BY A  PROFESSIONAL?  THAT IS THE  QUESTION!

This is strictly a personal preference. If you are the girl that always has your friends help you with your makeup then you definitely want to go with a professional on your wedding day. You want your wedding day makeup to be created by someone with skill and expertise. For the ladies that are the makeup gurus, you might decide to do to it yourself or it might just be a matter of not wanting to worry about doing your own makeup on your big day, so you hire a professional. Either way, you want a look that is both beautiful and long lasting.

A few makeup looks that may inspire you for your wedding day:

Bold and alluring eyes

Natural wedding makeup

Bold and colorful Lips

Smokey eyes with soft makeup

Bold lips and eyes

Soft smokey eyes with pink lips (my fave!)

Wedding Day Nails

Ladies, your big day is all about beauty, glam, looking your best and of course, above anything else, love. You want everything to be perfect from the décor, to your dress, makeup, hair and nails.

Neutral nails are the classic way to go. It’s a timeless look and photographs really well. You can’t go wrong with neutral nails!

Neutral nails are the classic way to go. It’s a timeless look and photographs really well. You can’t go wrong with neutral nails!

From the day of your proposal you’ve probably been more conscious of your hands and nails. Not only are you most likely looking at that gorgeous ring on your finger on a daily basis, but you probably have had friends, family and strangers (yes, even strangers) asking you to see your bling. You want to keep that special attention going that you’ve been giving your nails up until your wedding day.

Keep in mind; you are not the only one that will be showing off your hands on your wedding day. Your groom will be taking plenty of pictures with both of your hands being the main focal point. Now, we now how some men are about stepping foot in a salon to get a manicure, but if you can talk him into getting a manicure one time in his life, this is the time!

You can start caring for your hands and nails after your proposal by applying lotion and cuticle oil daily or at least a few times a week. This will ensure your hands and nails look their best on your wedding day.

Aside from having beautiful, moisturized hands, you want to find a color that fits you and the look you are going for on your wedding day. When it comes to choosing a color for your nails, you can keep it classic and go with a neutral color such as a soft pink or nude, or you can have fun with your nails and add some nail art. Below are some glamorous chic and fun nail ideas to inspire you!

Something blue is a newer trend. It’s a fun way to incorporate your “something blue” so it’s visible to everyone. If you’re more into the classic look, but also like this trend…try it on your toenails and still go with the neutral nails!

Something blue is a newer trend. It’s a fun way to incorporate your “something blue” so it’s visible to everyone. If you’re more into the classic look, but also like this trend…try it on your toenails and still go with the neutral nails!

Ladies, your big day is all about beauty, glam, looking your best and of course, above anything else, love. You want everything to be perfect from the décor, to your dress, makeup, hair and nails.

From the day of your proposal you’ve probably been more conscious of your hands and nails. Not only are you most likely looking at that gorgeous ring on your finger on a daily basis, but you probably have had friends, family and strangers (yes, even strangers) asking you to see your bling. You want to keep that special attention going that you’ve been giving your nails up until your wedding day.

Keep in mind; you are not the only one that will be showing off your hands on your wedding day. Your groom will be taking plenty of pictures with both of your hands being the main focal point. Now, we now how some men are about stepping foot in a salon to get a manicure, but if you can talk him into getting a manicure one time in his life, this is the time!

You can start caring for your hands and nails after your proposal by applying lotion and cuticle oil daily or at least a few times a week. This will ensure your hands and nails look their best on your wedding day.

Aside from having beautiful, moisturized hands, you want to find a color that fits you and the look you are going for on your wedding day. When it comes to choosing a color for your nails, you can keep it classic and go with a neutral color such as a soft pink or nude, or you can have fun with your nails and add some nail art. Below are some glamorous chic and fun nail ideas to inspire you!

Nail bling is fun and glamorous! If you want a neutral color, but want to add a little something extra, then these looks are for you! Would like more nail inspiration? Go follow @naildbytammy on instagram. Her work will have you WOW'd!

Nail bling is fun and glamorous! If you want a neutral color, but want to add a little something extra, then these looks are for you! Would like more nail inspiration? Go follow @naildbytammy on instagram. Her work will have you WOW'd!

Pale pink is one of my favorite looks for nails. It’s feminine, timeless and glamorous! 

Pale pink is one of my favorite looks for nails. It’s feminine, timeless and glamorous! 

Tips.....

When it comes to lotions and oils, look for these ingredients below, are great for moisture and hydration.

Vitamin E, almond oil, coconut oil, or jojoba oil, shea butter and cocoa butter

 

Cheers,

Heather

 

Beautiful and Long Lasting Wedding Hairstyles

If you’re anything like me, when my hair looks good, I feel good. I could have on my yoga’s with my boyfriend’s t-shirt, but still feel like a million dollars if my hair is styled. Of course, on your wedding day you want that same feeling only with a lot more glam (leave your yoga’s and boyfriend’s t-shirt at home).  On your wedding day you not only want a style that is beautiful, but also long lasting. There are so many different hair types, hair textures and different face shapes, it’s important on your wedding day that you find a hairstyle that works for you and a style that makes you feel glamorous and beautiful. When deciding on a hairstyle, think about what type of bride do you want to be: traditional, chic, romantic, modern, bohemian, beach, etc.?  Once you decide the look that is best for you, you can narrow it down to the look you want for your big day.  I’ll provide suggestions of hairstyle ideas that are beautiful and long lasting for different types of hair.


Straight hair….

If you fall into this category like me, you know how much we love adding curls into our hair.  Being that you have straight hair, you will probably have to use extra product to maintain your look. You can go for an updo or wear your hair down with curls.

Hair ideas: Updo with curls, Down-do with voluminous curls, Boho down-do.

 

Curly Hair….

Don’t fight it! Ladies, if you have naturally curly hair, work with what you have! Most women with straight hair try to achieve what you have naturally. Typically, when you have curly hair you also get the natural volume, which is great for any updo or down-do.

Hair ideas: Twisted curls, Romantic updo, Side swept do.

 

Ethnic Hair….

Whether you have wavy, straight, curly or kinky hair you want to make sure you use products that are made for you hair texture. You can either work with your natural hair or get a weave or extensions for your big day.

Hair ideas: Tousled waves, High donut bun, Back twist updo.

 

No matter your hair type, face shape, or hair texture you want to choose a style that is timeless, but also fashion forward.  Also, don’t be afraid of hair product on your wedding day, this is an easy fix to long lasting hair! Hair accessories are a beautiful and glamorous addition to any hairstyle!

Fun tip….

Plan a girls day (or weekend) and make it all about hair and/or wedding stuff! Pop open a bottle of champagne and get your creative juices flowing. You can use this time to talk about different hairstyles, share ideas, watch hair tutorials and do each other’s hair.  Not only will this help you and your bridesmaids narrow down some hair ideas, but it also allows everyone in your bridal party to get to know one another, making your big day that much more special. Plus, you get to bond with all of your girls! 

 

Until Next Time,

Heather

Wedding Day Hair- DO's & DONT's

 

Choosing the right hairstyle for your big day is almost as important as choosing the right dress. Whether you want to wear your hair up or wear it down, you want to choose a style that will turn heads. Your dress is the main attraction, but your hair pulls your entire look together. If you’re going to choose one day of your life where you step outside the box a little when it comes to your hair, your wedding day is that day, but also remember to be you! Let your beauty shine through!

DON’T forget to accessorize! As I mentioned above, your wedding day is the one day in your life where you want to do a little more than you typically would. That being said, hair accessories are a great way to add some extra bling to your look. Also, keep in mind when it comes to pictures; hairpieces, hair accessories and/or hair brooches photograph really well. Whether you plan on doing a sleek updo or voluminous curls, any hair accessory will be the perfect addition to your style.

DO spend time finding the right stylist. Whether if it’s by asking around or doing research yourself, it’s important that you find someone that is a good fit for you and is experienced in updos/wedding hair. With social media being one of our main avenues to advertise business, take advantage of that and request recommendations from friends and/or family.

DON’T assume your regular stylist is the best fit for your wedding day hair. Your regular stylist might be the queen of highlights or the cutting pro, but this doesn’t mean that she will give you the hair of your dreams on your big day.  If you’re lucky enough to have a stylist that is the master of everything, it’s a win-win situation!

DO have a hair trial! If your stylist charges for this, pay for it! Trust me, it’s worth it! It’s extremely important that you get to see your vision come to life. This will give you an idea of how your hair will look on your wedding day. This will also allow you to see if your vision is really what you want. Sometimes when we envision something, it doesn’t always appear to be what we thought once it comes to life.

DO change it up! A trend that I love is wearing one hairstyle during the ceremony and then switching your look for the reception. This is a fun way to create a couple different looks throughout the evening. If you’re lucky enough to have your stylist attend your wedding and help you with this, great! If not, put your bridesmaids to work and let them help you with your hair transition. This doesn’t have to be an extreme change in your hair; it can be a matter of letting out a few bobby pins to create a different look.

DO find what works for you! Pick a style that makes you feel beautiful and most importantly makes you feel like you! You want your style to be the most beautiful version of you.

DO NOT and I repeat DO NOT make any drastic hair changes right before your wedding day. This is a stressful time for you and you might not be thinking as clear as you normally would, so avoid making any major hair changes that you might regret on your wedding day.

                                         Additional tips...

Keep things such as the weather and temperature in mind. Don’t let your hair stress you out too much and remember; this is your day, enjoy it! Let your beautiful self shine through!!

 

Don't forget to follow us on IG & FB for more inspiration!

 

Cheers,

Heather



Meet Heather Nicole

 Heather Guilbeau is Redberri's newest Communications Specialist & Assistant Planner! 
I am so excited to welcome this beauty to the Redberri Team.  Heather has an intense passion for organization and details which makes her a great addition to the team. Her style, creativity and eagerness to help others will allow her to truly shine as a planner. Family and friends constantly relied on Heather to plan functions & that is when it became quite evident that event planning was her true passion. Event planning allows Heather to use her keen eye for detail and organizational skills along with her creativity! In addition, Heather holds a bachelor’s degree in business management. Heather is excited to be a part of the team & we are most certainly excited to have her!  She will be our  Pinterest guru!
 We guarantee that her smile will surely light up your heart!

    Fun Facts about Heather...

 

WHY DID YOU WANT TO BECOME AN EVENT PLANNER?

I have always loved planning parties/events and have been the go-to party planner in my family for years. I love the fact that it starts as a vision and then ends in a special event. I have a creative side and enjoy sharing that through event planning, from the small details of the decor to the overall experience of the special event/party.

 

FAVORITE TELEVISION SHOW

Always will be a Friends fan!

 

FAVORITE FOOD

Any Italian food. I can never pass up baked clams!

 

FAVORITE STORE TO SHOP

Nordstrom 

 

SOMETHING FUNNY ABOUT ME

I became an aunt when I was 5 years old!

 

Wanna Chat more with Heather? Email her at heathernicole@redberrievents.com!

 

Stay Fabulous,

Tiffany

 

The Maids

Choices, Choices & More Choices!

FINALLY…he asked and you said, “YES!”  Now, you are officially engaged! Ecstatic and overjoyed after patiently, sometimes impatiently waiting for this moment you call all of your family and friends to share the great news! On cloud nine, you overlooked the suggestive language from those closest to you with the presumption that they will not only be AT the wedding but that they will be IN the wedding. A few weeks later, you and your fiancé (doesn’t that sound good?!) discuss bridal party size. And now, the fun really begins…

Aligning the number of bridesmaids and groomsmen in the bridal party can be daunting on its own. Integrating your dreams with the expectations or requests of others may seem like a nightmare. Wake up, scroll down and read…let Redberri ease your mind!

Let’s lay the foundation. REMEMBER, the goal is always for you and your fiancé to be in harmony with one another.  Talk, listen, negotiate and agree! This will be instrumental through the entire wedding planning process. If necessary, pause…focus to what is most important to you and fiancé.

Redberri suggests creating a bridal party wish list with your fiancé to gauge the potential size of the party. Keep in mind; it may unrealistic to include everyone. If family, childhood friends, high school besties, college roommates, and possibly work BFF’s are contemplated the bridal party may become the guest list! So, as necessary, pare the list down based on priorities pre-determined by you and your fiancé.

 

A few useful tricks to follow that can help to finalize your bridal party:

 1.      Limit your bridal party to close family members and friends that are considered family.

 2.      Less can be more.

 3.      Don’t ask someone you are unsure about.

 4.      Golden rules are fairy tales. For example, what if your fiancé has 3 sisters? Do you include all of them? There is no golden rule for instances like this!

 5.      Pick someone who will simplify not complicate life. If you know someone is having financial problems, don’t ask! If you know someone has a hard time working with others, don’t ask!

6.    Favor great energy and good vibes!

7.    Opt for people who are GENUINELY happy for you and your fiancé!

8.    Decide based on who YOU want to stand by your side. There is no such thing as an obligation. No exceptions. Don’t allow anyone to pressure you.

9.    Keep those that will help make the journey and wedding one to remember!

10.  LAST BUT NOT LEAST, follow your heart!!


This day is all about you & your fiancé! Choose a great group of people who will help you make your wedding one to remember!

Have FUN with your squad!

Have FUN with your squad!

Stay Fabulous!

 

He Asked...She said YES!

Couple: Britt and Elle   Dated: 3 years   Hometown: San Diego, California

Couple: Britt and Elle   Dated: 3 years   Hometown: San Diego, California

Love doesn’t make the world go round, love is what makes the ride worthwhile.” – Elizabeth Browning

This quick feature is inspired by an amazing couple! To begin with, I have never worked with a man so genuinely excited about popping the question! Britt and Elle live in San Diego, California which is quite a ways from Chicago, but Redberri never allows distance to be a barrier on our ability to execute a fabulous event! Britt’s enthusiasm and love for Elle made me eager to work with and for him! From our initial consultation he was adamant that this experience needed to be one that Elle would never forget. His love and thoughtfulness shined through every detail throughout the planning and for the actual proposal. Britt wanted to create a story that he and Elle would be proud to share. This really resonated with me. In essence, he was a man with a plan and Redberri brought his plan to fruition. After working together over a period of time, choosing the perfect venue, corresponding vendors, while focusing on each and every detail...he did just as he sought out to do, he created a lifetime memory!

Britt, I would like to thank you again for choosing Redberri Events to help make this day so special!

We wish you and Elle nothing but love & happiness!

 

 

THE PROPOSAL

  Michael J Wolf Fine Arts Britt shared that he wanted to pop the question at a beautiful art gallery because him and Elle had recently began being more adventurous and trying new things. When looking for the venue I wanted to make sure I presented him with the best galleries in San Diego. After working with the owner Michael J. Wolf and knowing what his gallery had to offer we knew this would be the perfect venue to melt Elle’s heart.

 

Michael J Wolf Fine Arts

Britt shared that he wanted to pop the question at a beautiful art gallery because him and Elle had recently began being more adventurous and trying new things. When looking for the venue I wanted to make sure I presented him with the best galleries in San Diego. After working with the owner Michael J. Wolf and knowing what his gallery had to offer we knew this would be the perfect venue to melt Elle’s heart.


  The Painting Britt chose to have a painting created of him and Elle to display as he was ready to pop the question. Creative, right? The painting was absolutely amazing! Special thanks to Artist Joey Romero out of California for making it happen! You can follow him on Instagram @theory17!  

 

The Painting

Britt chose to have a painting created of him and Elle to display as he was ready to pop the question. Creative, right? The painting was absolutely amazing! Special thanks to Artist Joey Romero out of California for making it happen! You can follow him on Instagram @theory17!

 


  She has the cutest surprised face!

 

She has the cutest surprised face!

   

 

 

She said YES!!

How could she not say yes to such a beautiful and heartfelt proposal?


  The Ring Britt put some much love and thought into choosing the perfect ring for Elle! All I can is flawless!

 

The Ring

Britt put some much love and thought into choosing the perfect ring for Elle! All I can is flawless!


  The Marine Room After the fabulous proposal Britt wanted to ensure he took Elle to a beautiful oceanfront restaurant. After finding several restaurants that he and Elle had already visited I knew it was time to research a little harder. I can’t tell you how many restaurants were either already booked or somewhere him and Elle already had memories. Then I found the beautiful Marine Room, this swank restaurant was perfect to end the evening!  

 

The Marine Room

After the fabulous proposal Britt wanted to ensure he took Elle to a beautiful oceanfront restaurant. After finding several restaurants that he and Elle had already visited I knew it was time to research a little harder. I can’t tell you how many restaurants were either already booked or somewhere him and Elle already had memories. Then I found the beautiful Marine Room, this swank restaurant was perfect to end the evening!

 


  And they lived happily ever after…

 

And they lived happily ever after…

 

Special thanks to  Melina Savarese for capturing such an amazing evening!

Meet the Meddlers

    Mama Joyce, Kandi Burruss, Todd Tucker

    Mama Joyce, Kandi Burruss, Todd Tucker

Last weekend, I decided to relax and catch up on some reality TV. I finally got a chance to re-watch last season, Season 6, of The Real Housewives of Atlanta (RHOA) and I was in for a treat.  For those of you that don’t know, RHOA is the third installment of the Real Housewives franchise on Bravo. This series focuses on the personal and professional lives of elite women in Atlanta.  If you have followed this franchise, I’m sure you would agree that Season 6 was filled with so much drama!  I quickly remembered how much I laughed, cried, yelled and laughed again while watching!

A major story line of the season was regarding the drama between Kandi Burruss and her mother, Joyce Jones also known as Mama Joyce.   Mama Joyce caused quite a stir about Kandi’s  relationship with Todd Tucker, who is now her husband.  Mama Joyce did her best to convince the audience that she was doing what was in Kandi’s best interest. That is up for debate.  She repeatedly slandered Todd’s name by accusing him of being an “opportunist” and unworthy of having Kandi as his wife. Mama Joyce was very vocal about the union which eventually caused tension between Kandi and Todd, and it still does today. 

I felt so bad for Todd because he just had no idea how to fix this issue.  Kandi was not much help because she was unsure how to deal with her mother without being disrespectful. She struggled to accomplish this even with the hopes of standing up for herself and her love for Todd. After watching this entire season for the second time, I thought it would be a great idea to talk about meddling family members and how to deal with this issue prior to saying, “I do.”

It is essential to prepare for future in-laws or your own family before getting married.  Most of us are usually so in love that we often forget about some of the outside people or things that can greatly impact the success of the marriage. When we are in our bubble of love we rarely think about how we will balance two or three families and how difficult it could be.  How will you balance spending time with your family? Your fiancé’s family?  Your newly created family between you and your fiancé?  Just thinking about it can be very overwhelming.

In my opinion, there is no such thing as divided loyalties. Once you decide to tie the knot your loyalty is to your spouse and your newly created family.  Does this mean you don’t still love your other family? Absolutely not! Trying to figure out who is most important is impossible. Yes, you love and value your other family but your newly created family should take priority.  I know this is much easier said than done but it will keep down confusion in your household for years to come.

When family and significant others don’t get along it can cause tension and even a wedge between you and your spouse. Meddling family members, especially parents, can be a nightmare! We’ve all heard the horror stories of the meddling in-law! The million dollar question, who is responsible for the meddling family member(s)? Each person is responsible for their own family because he/she has the most history with their respective families.  Each person has to be being willing to tell a meddling family member to, “MIND THEIR OWN BUSINESS (respectfully of course :-) )!”  The truth of the matter is everyone has an opinion, and everyone has advice to give but it’s up you and your spouse to keep them in check.

Now, many of us have old school mothers who will have a comeback when you try telling her to back off, we all know that mother who will ask, “WHO GON’ CHECK ME BOO?” as best said by Sheree Whitfield (season 1-4) that’s why it is very important to be firm but respectful when speaking to your mother especially when you are letting her know to back off.   It is pivotal to make sure you and your fiancé are always on the same page. This will make the process much easier if approached as team. After all, TEAMWORK MAKES THE DREAMWORK!

Set your boundaries! You and your fiancé should discuss desired boundaries and how to lay them down.If you have a meddling family member who makes you feel guilty for not taking their advice or “choosing” your newly created family over them I would suggest having a heart-to-heart talk early on to discuss concerns and expectations.  Don’t negate the warning signs before the wedding! You may be able to identify potential meddlers before engagement or marriage.

It is inevitable that others will have and maybe even give unwarranted advice. You would not be wrong to ask for them to keep it at a minimum or to themselves…unless you sought out their advice. With this in mind, be careful with opening the door.  Remember, each person is responsible for their own family.  Family members are more receptive to change if it comes from their relative and NOT the spouse. Don’t fool yourself either, each other’s family will always be there. An on-going war will only cause heartache for your fiancé which ultimately trickle down into your marriage.   Peace & Happiness will only make life more enjoyable!


 

Three Things to Tell a Meddler…

1.    There are two people in this relationship and you are not one!

2.    I am not you and you are not me.

3.    My relationship is just that, MINE!

 

Remember Meddlers will...

1.   Judge

2.  Making Statements or asking questions that are NOT solution              orientated

3.  Offering unsolicited advice


Check out this article on signs of a meddling soon to be mother-in-law!

http://newlyweds.about.com/od/familyfriends/tp/Top-10-Signs-Of-A-Meddling-Mother-In-Law.htm

 

Book Suggestion:

The Loveless Family: Getting Past Estrangement and Learning How to Love

 By Jon P. Bloch

http://www.amazon.com/The-Loveless-Family-Estrangement-Learning/dp/0313392730

 

 LIVE.  LAUGH.  LOVE.  BE HAPPILY MARRIED!

-Tiffany

 

 

The WEDDING vs. The MARRIAGE

Most women, including myself, have their wedding planned before they even have Mr. Right!  Instinctively, women love planning things, whether it’s a wedding or a dinner party. If you’d ask my husband he would say I just love to spend money but I beg to differ.   Like many women, I love the excitement of planning a perfect event not only for myself but also for the enjoyment of others. 

During our couples retreat, we discussed the value of marriage and the necessity of being financially stable to get married.  It seems that nowadays the wedding is more important than the marriage. We can thank social media and reality television for that as they have glorified wedding planning and the wedding! Society is enamored with extravagant OVER THE TOP weddings. And as a result, weddings are now a production. This says very little about how to plan for life after the big day. 

 How do you view marriage?  Should couples come into a marriage equally yoked and both financially stable?  In my personal opinion, marriage is all about partnership and building a solid team.  When building a foundation for the future debt should not be an option, especially from a wedding.  Don’t allow the amount of “likes” on social media impact the decision making for the wedding or determine if your wedding day was perfect or not.  A beautiful couple willing to confess their love in front of GOD, family and friends is what makes a wedding perfect.  Investing (as described below), energy and money are equally important with the wedding as it is with the marriage.

 

Invest:  Take the time to get to know one another on a new level now that the wedding is over.  Note, there is a difference between spending time and investing time.  Let’s break it down! Spending means using something up or exhausting it, without anything in return or a mutual benefit. When you invest time you  are engaging in activities that you both enjoy which are calculated to bring meaningful rewards to the relationship. Investing your time in each other leads to a stronger happier marriage. You can’t afford not to.  How will you and your honey invest time after wedding is done?   I suggest engaging in different activities and conversations with a circle of close friends to build great memories and an even better legacy.

 

Energy: Don’t let the excitement and thrill go after the wedding! Do things together in order to stay energized. Exercising is the perfect example of staying energized together…in and out the bedroom!

 

Money: Money is power in a marriage even if it’s subliminal.  Try your best as a couple to live debt-free , save and diversify your revenue streams. Believe in each other’s talents and dreams because it make you rich in love and one day rich in money!

 

Understand that marriage develops over time and being married to the love of your life is a reward. There isn't a ring or wedding that should stand in the way of true love.

 

 

LIVE. LAUGH. LOVE &  BE HAPPILY MARRIED!

 

 

Stay Sweet & Fabulous,

Tiffany

 

The Ring & The Social Network

Hello, Loves! Today’s blog post is inspired by a recent group discussion with beautiful couples, from Southern Belles & Gents to City Chic Couples.  It is important to distinguish as I have learned where a person is from can have an effect on their thoughts and opinions.  For example, the southern belles weren't phased by a big rock or fancy wedding.  On the contrary, the city chic ladies were all about a ring and wedding filled with glitz & glam.  Neither mindset is wrong as long as there is authentic love for their significant other.

the ring.jpg

 

The conversation began with the ladies discussing the engagement rings and proposals, the things we have all dreamed since childhood One of the fellas looked over and asked about the appropriate amount to spend on an engagement ring and how to meet his girlfriend’s expectations despite his budget. I shared my thoughts as I feel every person should know and understand their significant other’s financial situation enough to set realistic expectations on the ring.  Couples should be knowledgeable and understand the importance of the 4 C’s.  The 4 C’s were developed by  Gemological Institute of America (GIA) - carat, clarity, color and cut.  With regards to the ring, BIGGER is not always BETTER.

 

Ladies, stop comparing ring sizes to a friend, celebrity or worrying what others will say about your ring after posting it on social media.  After all, does the size of the ring equate to how loved you are? Men should be allowed to choose a ring that is within a comfortable price range so that he is not still paying on your ring years into the marriage.  Truth be told, most women will be looking for an upgrade within the first 5-10 years of the marriage. The days of a groom spending one to three month’s salary on an engagement ring are over!  I would suggest making a personal decision based on the importance of the ring to your future fiance. 

 

Who remembers this episode of BET's hit TV series, The Game? Melanie loved Derwin so much but instead of crying tears of joys she was crying about the size of her ring!

Who remembers this episode of BET's hit TV series, The Game? Melanie loved Derwin so much but instead of crying tears of joys she was crying about the size of her ring!

 

This sparked another inquiry, “what happened to men just picking out a ring and surprising his soon to be fiance?”  I think all of the ladies had a shocked look on their face. Over time “the engagement“ has changed. More men are consulting with friends, family and even significant others to make sure he picks the perfect ring.  Ladies, it is okay to share your preferences but after that allow your man to do the leg work.  We should think of the ring as more than just a pretty stone that sits on your finger; it is symbolic of the covenant you are establishing. Allow the man to put his all into it so that he can feel proud.  And we all know the importance of stroking your man’s ego!

 

Alternatively, what about the man who is completely in love and ready to tie the knot but does not want to wait until he is able to afford a ring?  Ladies, what do you do? Accept happily? Accept begrudgingly? Decline?  We all have been taught that an engagement ring is symbolic for the love your significant has for you but do you earnestly believe in that?  Quite simplistically the ring is just that; a beautiful piece a jewelry  that you are allowed to boast on but it does in my opinion symbolize the love your partner has for you.   I understand that when a man takes a woman’s hand in marriage he gives her a ring BUT it is not a requirement that every proposal has to be done with a ring.  Some women are okay without an engagement ring and only having a wedding band as a symbol of their union.  The motive of a marriage proposal is for the man to confess his love and ask to spend the rest of his life with the woman, right?   The occasion is about much more than the ring given.  

 

Gentlemen, if you want to propose without a ring please understand that you are taking a major risk but the LOVE you share could be worth the risk.

More Info on choosing the perfect bling!

http://gia4cs.gia.edu/EN-US/the-diamond-4-cs.htm

 

Stay Sweet & Fabulous,

Tiffany

 

 

 

OMG! I'm so excited!

Wanna know about Tiffany?

 

Hey loves!! Thank you for taking the time to see what is going on with Redberri! I am super excited about our first blog post! Please stop by every now and then to see what’s new, what’s trending and of course just to say hi! I am so excited to be taking the plunge in this exciting event planning industry. I am looking forward to meeting so many more awesome people!! Please join me as I take this journey down event planning lane!

-Tiffany

Why did you want to become an event planner?

It’s the coolest job ever!! I love weddings, baby showers, birthday parties & good food, ohhhh and I’m pretty good at event planning! LOL!

Where did you get the name Redberri?

I’m sure everyone is waiting for this cool answer but to be honest I don’t have one!  My favorite color is red & my mom said what about Redberri? & I loved it!  

What is your favorite television show?

I loooove most reality TV when I have a chance to watch it.

What is your favorite food?

I love Cajun food, it’s one of my favs!!

Three words to describe yourself?

Charismatic

Compassionate

Hard-working

Tell us something funny about you?

I really wish I could sing! I try my best with the voice I have but my friends tell me I'm no good :-( !

 

 

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Stay in touch & Stay fabulous, Loves!!